


Love Handle

by BananasAreForParties



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who & Related Fandoms, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: F/M, Fish & Chips, For Science!, Gratuitous Smut, PWP, Sex Toys, Smut, Tenth Doctor Era, The Doctor's frankly magnificent time ship, here there be smut, that escalated quickly
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-03
Updated: 2017-04-03
Packaged: 2018-10-14 12:45:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,597
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10536735
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BananasAreForParties/pseuds/BananasAreForParties
Summary: Rose notices there's a new instrument on the Tardis's control panel.





	

The Tardis was a living, dynamic ship. Her clever console changed daily. Buttons changed into knobs. One day, the side facing the front door had a row of sliding keys and the next, it’d been swapped with an old typewriter’s keys labeled in an alien script. A pet rock that served as a counterweight disappeared, never to be replaced. Children’s kazoos became essential pistons for the greatest of time machines. Tea bells and penny whistles, paper weights and a commemorative teaspoon from Roswell; all were useful components. Rose grew in amusement, in delight, and in expectation for the ship’s clever incorporation of what would otherwise be pieces of junk.

When Rose caught sight of the new glass lever, all prior expectations were superseded. She threw herself onto the jump seat and dissolved in a fit of laughter. 

The Doctor looked at Rose. Looked at his console. Scratched his head. Looked back at Rose who turned beet red in the face and laughed all harder when he asked, “What?”

Rose gasped. Collected herself by holding her aching belly and wiping away tears with the back of her shirt sleeve. She said, “The handle,” and covered her mouth to smother her giggles.

He looked and said, “What?” again.

“Itsadildo.”

“What?!” he exclaimed, honing in on the offensive bit of machinery. Then he asked, “What’s it?"

Relishing the chance to properly scandalize him, Rose skipped over to the console, hopped up, wrapped one hand around the slightly curved equipment, and pumped it a few times. She covered her mouth shut with the other.

“Huh,” said the Doctor, stepping up for closer examination, bending a bit and squinting. “I suppose it does resemble a phallus.” He sniffed. “If you’re dim enough to suppose every lever in existence were a phallus.”

Rose stopped fondling it. “Are you kidding? Look at it, it’s got the little bulb-y head.”

He rolled his eyes. “To keep your hand from slipping off.”

“It’s the right size for a dildo.”

“It’s the right size for a hand to hold a _lever_.”

“It has a vein right up the underside.”

“Those bumps improve the grip.”

Rose crossed her arms. “Little divot at the tip.”

“Manufacturing flaw.”

Rose pursed her lips. So this was how it was to be. “You don’t want to admit you accidentally attached a human sex toy to steer your frankly magnificent time ship. I’ve seen cock and dildos before, Doctor, and _that_ is a dildo.”

“Prove it,” he said, churlish. Then swallowed down the hard implication he’d not intended. 

“What?” Rose said. 

The Doctor had a choice; she could see those wheels turning in his head. He could either apologize or double-down, as though this were some cleverness puzzle he could win with the right words rather than face the very hard, very stiff facts. 

He lit up, as though he’d come up with a clever, clever solution. “Well, go on. Give it a try to see if it’ll work as a proper phallus or only has the characteristics of phallus.”

_"What?” ___

__“If not then you shouldn’t be so rude, pointing and laughing and saying a thing is a thing when it only resembles a thing by happenstance. You'll hurt feelings.”_ _

__Oh, so that was his game, was it? Bluff and expect modesty, humiliation, and human taboos will keep her fettered. Her better self would have let it go, let the Doctor’s Puritanical self-superiority win out. Except that would mean watching every bloody morning as the Doctor steered the Tardis clutching a fake cock. It was completely absurd!_ _

__No. No, she would make him pay for that bluff. “ _You_ want _me_ to prove that is a dildo?”_ _

__He leaned against the console edge, crossing his legs, perfectly self-assured. “I am scientifically minded and—” (did his gaze drop to her skirt and leggings or was that her imagination?) “—I am perfectly willing to be persuaded. That is, if you’re willing to perform a proper experiment and present evidence to the contrary, I’d be happy to obser—change. Change my position. I mean, change my opinion.”_ _

__He lost it there, at the end, his face flushing a bit around the collar._ _

__Was he. . .flustered?_ _

__Was the Doctor sexually flustered? Or was this embarrassment?_ _

__“You mean you’ll change your opinion from it being a lever to the blatant fact it _is_ a dildo?”_ _

__“Yes. Well, I would only concede it could be both. But there’d have to be proof.” A hint of uncertainty crept into his tone. “That is if you were willing to experiment.”_ _

__“For science?”_ _

__He nodded._ _

__Rose bit her lip. Eyed the questionable glass cock. Bulb top, about 14, 15 cm in length, slight curve, about 10 cm around. It was a completely average sort of cock. This time when she touched it, it was to check if it was the sort of thing she might find pleasant in her body. It was cold. Smooth, solid. Not brittle. Sturdy mounting. It was a bit too vertical, though. The console sloped, so she couldn’t mount it if it was facing straight up. If she had a boost and scooted down from the top, she could slide down onto it if it were angled toward the central rotor. Rose pushed it into place and the Doctor gave a sharp intake of breath, stifled at once._ _

__“Of course,” Rose said, taking a chance, “I’d need assistance?”_ _

__“Of course,” he agreed, rapt. “Anything.”_ _

__“For science.”_ _

__“Naturally, for science.”_ _

__She reached for his sleeve, rubbing her thumb over a button of his suit-cuff summoning every last ounce of courage she had to say, “Primarily, with lubrication.”_ _

__“Sensible,” he agreed, voice deeper. He frowned. “Though, I doubt I have anything on hand that would be suitable at the moment. Might I,” and here he took care to speak slowly, “Would manual stimulation solve the issue?”_ _

__Rose’s heart just about beat itself out of her chest. He wanted to—his finger muscles were taunt, restrained from reaching out to _manually stimulate_ her. “Yes.”_ _

__She steadied herself against the console as he closed the distance to grasp the bottom hem of her skirt and inch it up, then tugged on her leggings. Just a tug, enough to alert her to the fact he was going to remove them._ _

__Rose toed off her trainers. The Doctor wasted no time bending to one knee, pulling the leggings down, and removing her socks. Popping right back up as soon as they were gone, he reached for the over-all straps. They were hooked over her breasts, keeping the denim skirt on._ _

__He thumbed the latches, pressing them slightly into her breasts. “This will have to go.”_ _

__“Yeah,” Rose agreed, a throbbing sensation starting as the needed lubrication manifested._ _

__He cupped her breasts. Squeezed. The latches to the overalls came undone. Rose whimpered and shifted her thighs. Noticing, he licked his lips and continued to squeeze and massage even after a strap slid off her shoulder. The only thing keeping it up was the Doctor’s body, pressing her back against the console edge. With a grunt of frustration at the thickness of the denim, he took a half-step back to let it fall to the grating._ _

__Rose was left in her t-shirt, (she was thankful she wore a nice, if plain, satin bra today) and plain, pink cotton knickers. He stared at the juncture of her thighs, abandoning a breast to touch her._ _

__He skimmed the elastic at her leg juncture, following the line down. Rose gasped as he brushed her through the cotton barrier._ _

__He stopped, hovering over her. “This okay?” he rasped._ _

__“Yes.”_ _

__He cupped her mound of Venus and Rose braced herself by gripping his shoulders._ _

__“They’re damp.”_ _

__“Take them off?” Rose asked, hopeful._ _

__He didn’t need telling twice. Off went the knickers at once and they shamelessly went into his pocket. He had an aura about him that was challenging about it as he righted himself again. Rose bit her lip._ _

__“Where was I? Right.” He made Rose put her hands back on his shoulders, “best hang on.”_ _

__Rose clung, nails biting into pinstripe as he caressed her damp curls with a sigh. Petted her, discovered her folds, tested their strength with a playful tug to which Rose gave a cry of pleasure followed by another whimper._ _

__The Doctor’s jaw dropped marveling. “Oh, Rose that was,” he snapped it shut._ _

__Rose grinned even as she trembled, the Doctor parting her throbbing labia._ _

__“You’re right,” he said, his knee pressing between her thighs, prying her open further. “Wet, but not wet enough.”_ _

__A digit circled her entry then press forth inside her. Insistent, to the knuckle._ _

__He asked, “Will that do?” as Rose squirmed._ _

__“You’re gonna have to—”_ _

__He gave her a squeeze, palm digging into her clit._ _

__“—do a better job of manual stimula—ah!”_ _

__He gave a few quick pumps before settling in on a steady rhythm set to the rolling of Rose’s hips, her bum rubbing against the console edge. The musky scent of her sex melded with the spice of what Rose assumed to be the Doctor’s usual aftershave._ _

__“Bit tight,” he whispered into her ear. “I’m giving you another finger.”_ _

__Rose relaxed to accommodate him. It’d been more than a year since she’d had proper intercourse. More than a year since she first fantasized about the Doctor taking her to bed. On the jump seat. Here, at the console. The library. Anywhere and everywhere, all over the ship._ _

__He continued to encourage her with, “I can feel you. That’s it,” and she took another finger with a breathy moan. How did he know how to roll with her body? He effortlessly found her spot, stroking and gliding with wet, obscene squelches. Rose gave moans with every thrust now, her legs trembling with effort to keep upright. Taking notice, the Doctor gripped her bum and Rose couldn’t cut short her very real cry as she was getting there._ _

__He slowed, “Easy, Rose.”_ _

__Rose gripped his tie. She meant to be assertive, but it came out as a plea instead. “I need to be wet.” A whimper escaped her as he eased his fingers from her. Fear he was retreating gripped her until, with eyes locked, he licked his finger._ _

__“I think you are.”_ _

__Rose gave a strangled, dazed, “Yeah.”_ _

__The Doctor put on a frown. “Lever’s a bit dry tho. . .” A wrinkle formed between his brows._ _

__Rose turned, noting the translucent glass was not only dry but also cold. She thought, _'Penny, pound'_ and said, “I can manage that.” __

__She was dazed and, putting little thought into it, turned around before the Doctor’s gasp cued her into realizing she had the opportunity to give him a bit of a show. With a smirk, she grasped the dildo about the base. The glass warmed under her hand. She licked it, following the curve from the middle to the top. Mindful of her teeth, she pressed the smooth tip past her lips, taking it in as far as she could, allowing it to match her body temperature before commencing. Hollowing her cheeks, she bobbed her head. Aware of the Doctor moving beside her, angling for a better view, she drew off with a few last licks to the shaft._ _

__The Doctor’s suit-clad hip brushed against her shoulder. Voice rumbling, he said, “Best give it a little more,” as his hand stroked down her hip to cup her bum._ _

__Rose opened her mouth wider, took a deep breath, and took the glass deep as the Doctor slipped his fingers between her folds. Teasing, stroking around her entry as she felicitated the instrumentation._ _

__With a fingertip slipping past her entry, he said, “That should about do it,” and stepped back._ _

__A keening of disappointment escaped her and Rose gave up on sucking, wiping her mouth as she straightened. The lust reflected by her face was a mirror of her own. Rose reached for him, to yank his tie and put her lips to his—but he took hold of her hand. The fit was perfect, as was his mad grin of giddy happiness which drove the wrinkles around his eyes deep._ _

__“Up you go, Rose Tyler.”_ _

__Rose hopped up, her bare bum to the edge of the console. “There are an awful lot of bits and bobs on here.”_ _

__“Don’t worry, I’ve got you,” the Doctor said, helping as she scooted back and drew up her knees to situate herself._ _

__It was a vulnerable moment. She was naked and would have to spread her legs to bear the soft, sensitive tissue. Will the glass cock be too hard without the usual give of flesh? What about the Doctor? Would it be weird or uncomfortable for him to watch, in all his clothes?_ _

__As usual, it was the Doctor who allayed her fears. With no intention of letting her go, he encouraged with, “Put your knees here, against my chest. You see there? _Leverage_ ,” and was outrageously pleased with himself. Rose laughed, placing her hands against the console for support._ _

__Cold, the tip brushed against her labia and her laughter turned into a breathy moan. She rubbed against the length, splitting her well-whetted lips. The Doctor licked his own plump lower lip as he watched. Hungry. Like a man who’d like to do more than watch. That spurred Rose on, rolling her hips to slide against the smooth glass, teasing her clit with neat swivel, rewarding the Doctor’s focus._ _

__It didn’t take long before Rose wanted more, needed to be filled. She reaches between her legs to adjust it a bit more. At once, the Doctor was summoned to attention, awoken from a sensual stupor._ _

__“Let me,” he said. His long, manly hands spread over her bum, taking her weight and supporting her effort. Encircled in the arms and propped against the encouraging Doctor, Rose notched the dildo and slid down._ _

__Cool, but warming fast, its rigidity was offset by being pleasingly curved and well-fitted to her size. The Doctor was rapt. Mouth slack, lips parted in awe and desire, he watched as Rose welcomed the lever inside._ _

__“Is it,” his tongue darts out again, “is it much like proper phallic entertainment unit?”_ _

__Rose would have laughed but was too overwhelmed with sensation. Instead, she put one hand to her clit and balanced back on the other. “Very much.”_ _

__“Naturally, it’ll only be a valid conclusion if you can achieve orgasm.”_ _

__Rose moaned, rubbing slow circles into her clit and, utilizing the leverage of her knees against the Doctor’s chest, began raising and lowing herself. Slowly at first to get a feel for it. Then, when she found it quite satisfying, Rose set an easy pace for her thighs to maintain. Almost at once, she felt the good prickle of sweat under her arms and the nice, slow build of pleasure. It was nice. Very, very nice, except she began to feel quite hot. It was no wonder, as she was still wearing her shirt._ _

__Rose leaned forward, still rolling her hips thought fully impaled, and without self-consciousness took hold of the hem and pulled it up over her head. She popped out of the shirt to find the Doctor agog._ _

__“Too hot,” Rose explained with a smile._ _

__“O-of course.” His throat bobbed as he swallowed. Then, through his lashes asked, “Maybe it’d be safest to remove the brazier, too?”_ _

__Rose reigned in her urge to laugh, muting it to a tongue-touched smile, and slid a satin strap from her shoulder._ _

__The Doctor meeped. There was no other word to describe the sound he made and Rose couldn’t help laughing now, dispensing with her bra altogether._ _

Her laughter promptly stopped when he growled and set to lavishing her breasts with kisses. Licks. Then he put his oral fixation to use sucking. With moans, Rose’s hand went straight back to work at her clit, her thighs straining. Uninstructed, the Doctor began assisting, raising her up and down. It wasn’t long. The Doctor knew what he was after, almost as well as Rose knew how to get herself off. Rose came on the hard shaft, her thighs clenching the Doctor’s sides. Her feet about lost their purchase, but the Doctor had her quite secure, parting from her breast with a pop to feels as she broke apart in his arms.

He smoothed her hair back, gazing up into her eyes as she regained her breath. “How was it?”

__His eyes were dilated and his freckles pronounced. She had the urge to kiss them._ _

__“Good.” She winkled her nose. “Lot less comfortable after I cum.”_ _

__He woke up some. “Oh. Let’s have you off this.”_ _

__Her thigh shook as he helped her, freeing her with a bit of a wet squelch. She felt somewhat awkward, sitting at the edge with her legs dangling closed. To break the tension, Rose said, “Well. That settles that?”_ _

__“Settles?” The Doctor asked, wrapping his warm arms around her._ _

__“Think I’ve proved that’s definitely a dildo.”_ _

__His eyes flickered down to her breasts before he asked, “Do you think so?”_ _

__“’Course. I think I know what a cock is like.”_ _

__“Sure.”_ _

__Huffing she added, “And I came.”_ _

__The Doctor masked his sharp intake of breath with, “Right, ahem, yes, but. Uh. A real experiment would issue a control.”_ _

__Slowly, Rose mouthed, “Control.”_ _

__“Yes, a control to remove any variables which may unduly influence the experiment’s conclusion.”_ _

__Rose slid her finger up the Doctor’s tie as a twinge of arousal blossomed at her core. “Like a comparison.”_ _

__“Yes.”_ _

__It was a little cruel, but Rose couldn’t help herself. “With a real, proper dildo?”_ _

__He half-growled, half-huffed with indignation. “With a real, proper cock, the proper comparison for all dildos.”_ _

__All boring dildos, sure, Rose supposed, but she was quite on board for where he was going._ _

__His hands slid from her hips to the crease of her thighs. “Naturally, you require re-stimulation.”_ _

__Rose felt breathless already, parting a bit. “I could use some, yeah.”_ _

__He widened her further. “Oral stimulation would be best.”_ _

__Rose whimpered. “Oh, please, Doctor—”_ _

__The Doctor didn’t require any further encouragement. He held her under each knee and lapped into her. Tasted her before laving her lips open, adding pressure and suction. Rose couldn’t help the noises issuing forth as she held onto the console for dear life, her hips taking on a mind of their own. She didn’t mean to shove into his face, not really, it was just that his bloody oral fixation has lent his mouth and tongue to certain talents which drove her wild. If she hadn’t just cum, it wouldn’t have taken her long to get off on it. As it was, he did a marvelous job of working her up, and up, and up._ _

__“Doc-Doctor, I need—”_ _

__He took his mouth off of her, which was not what she needed, but did he ever look good: hair in disarray and mouth wet with her._ _

__Breathily, she said, “I was close.”_ _

__He wiped his chin decidedly. His eyes were as wild as she feels. “On your feet, Rose Tyler.”_ _

__Rose whimpered for want, not in protest, but he quite insistently helped her to her feet. He faced her toward the console and Rose bent over, offering. Behind her was the distinct clicking of belt and zipper being unlashed and Rose shifted her weight, her thighs rubbing as she felt a drip spill over the edge her labia._ _

__Sweet anticipation overtook Rose as the delectable moment his cock would touch her grew imminent. What she did not anticipate was how he held her hand, entwining their fingers as the hot, wet head of his cock slid against her slit. Nor the way his fingers slid through hers, nor how he then guided her to wrap her hand around the slick lever._ _

__“Hold on,” he breathed into her ear, rough with the effort of holding back, the pleasing weight of his body caging hers._ _

__“Rascal,” Rose teased._ _

__“Rake,” the doctor corrected, though was immediately distracted by feeding his length into her, much too caught up in the act to make clever quips. Rose pressed back, equal to being filled and rapturous as he fondled her clit, gliding in out with ease. It was the least dignified sex Rose has ever had, complete with loud moans and whimpers, and difficulty holding position on account of slippery hands. Neither of them had the will to last and Rose cried out her orgasm, her hot breath misting the smooth bits of the console's metal._ _

__The Doctor finished at once, following up with the undignified, "I shouldn't have lasted a moment longer."_ _

__Rose giggled. "You know, with a proper dildo a lady doesn't have to worry about wilting."_ _

__"Oi!"_ _

__"It's insult you or the Tardis and only one of you regulates shower temperature."_ _

__"Egh, fair point," said the Doctor. Then, after zipping himself back into his trousers, he wagged his finger at the console. "But don't you go inflating _her_ ego."_ _

__Rose would've patted the console, but she was rather sticky. "Speaking of showers."_ _

__The Doctor froze. "Rose, are you propositioning what I think you're propositioning?"_ _

__"Yes."_ _

__"Excellent! A proper adult entertainment device should lend itself to easy clean-up!"_ _

__"Have we progressed from experimentation to product testing?"_ _

__"If I admitted that, I'd have to concede to your argument."_ _

__Damn, he'd caught on._ _

__He continued, "Though I should enjoy testing again."_ _

__"In the shower?"_ _

__He helped her hop off the console. "In numerous showers. All the showers." The lights flickered. "And after I've wiped down the console."_ _

__Rose smiled and kissed him._ _


End file.
